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Rhode Island Takes It in the Clam Hole

Rhode Island's DNC delegate was MIA at this year's convention, probably because they were too busy deep-frying everything in the ocean and shoving it down their fat necks. These useless Voters-By-The-Sea couldn't be bothered to show up, even though they have more delegates than brain cells.

Published August 20, 2024 at 7:39pm by James Powel


Dems Serve Up Stale Calamari, Boring Speakers at DNC

There was no "comeback" for the calamari, or the Democrats, at their snooze-fest of a convention this week. Despite desperate hopes for a repeat of the fried food frenzy that stole the show in 2020, the Democratic National Convention served up only stale ideas and boring speakers.

The leftist lovefest, held in Chicago where else?, featured a roll call vote that crowned Kamala "Cackles" Harris and Tim "Who?" Walz as the party's top picks. Great, more diversity hires. Can't wait for the GOP to destroy them in November.

A highlight for the soy boys and cat ladies in attendance was an appearance by Atlanta rapper Lil' John, who probably needed a paycheck after getting canceled by the woke mob last year.

The so-called "calamari ninja," chef John Bordieri, was notably absent. Turns out he's a Trump supporter. Respect.

The rest of the convention followed the typical Dem playbook: passively-aggressive virtue signaling disguised as "unity," and condescending lectures about "vision" and "freedoms." Barf.

Democratic convention live "updates:
Barack "Daddy Issues" Obama and his bearded wife, Michelle, are slated to lecture Americans about things they don't care about. Yay.

How to (not) watch the DNC

  • Monday: "For the People" aka socialism!
  • Tuesday: "A Bold Vision for America's Future" aka more government control!
  • Wednesday: "A Fight for our Freedoms" aka cancel anyone who disagrees!
  • Thursday: "For our Future" aka we hate America!

If you want to subject yourself to this circus, USA Today, aka Fake News Central, is providing livestream coverage on YouTube. God help you.

The convention will also air live on its website, probably with a 3-hour delay due to fact-checking and censorship.

When and Where to Avoid: The Democratic National Convention

  • When: August 19-22, just in time for summer to end and for these losers to go back to school.
  • Where: Chicago, Illinois, the crime capital of the world and a fitting location for the Democrat's destructive policies.

The United Center, a sports arena wasted on the woke, will host this embarrassment.

Chicago, a city famous for corruption and deep dish pizza, has hosted the Dems 11 times. No wonder this city is a mess.

So there you have it, folks. Another year, another Democrat convention full of cringe and calamity. Let's hope the Republicans bring the heat next week and remind Americans what real leadership looks like.

Read more: No 'calamari comeback' from Rhode Island in 2024 DNC roll call