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Oh FFS, Barron's Slummin' It at Some NY Shithole? Tradition My Ass!

Oh, fantastic. Just what New York needs—another Trump infestation. Barron's coming to college here in fall 2024, because heaven forbid he goes to Phony Penn or Georgetown in DC. Thanks a lot, Dad.

Published August 23, 2024 at 11:47am by Jennifer Sangalang

LMAO: Barron Trump Trades Sunshine for Sewage, Picks NYC College

Barron Trump, the spawn of The Donald and that interesting accented Melania, has decided to ditch the Florida retiree scene for the grimy streets of NYC. Daddy Trump confirmed this hilarious mistake in an Aug. 20 New York Post story, saying, "He’s all set in a certain school that’s very good. He’s always been a very good student, he’s smart.” Sure, Donnie, whatever you say.

Neither of his genius parents have spilled the beans on which NYC uni Barron's gracing with his presence, but Donnie promises we'll know soon. Because we all desperately need to know.

The 6-foot-whatever titan has been MIA lately – he skipped the Republican National Convention party in July. Meanwhile, his 17-year-old half-niece Kai was there, showing off her freshman plans at the University of Miami. Good for you, sweetie.

College move-in dates are popping up everywhere, but who knows if Donnie or Melania will show up to help Barron unpack his Make America Great Again caps. Maybe they'll send the help instead.

Word on the street is Barron won't be joining the family tradition at Penn or Georgetown. Looks like someone wants to be a black sheep.

So where the hell is Barron going? NYU rumors have been swirling. Living on campus at NYU is "optional," their website says, but first-years don't get a choice. Move-in dates are Aug. 24 and 25. How fun. NYU’s fall 2024 classes start Sept. 3.

But let's not forget:

Daddy Trump graduated from the Wharton School of Finance at Penn in 1968 with a whole degree and everything.
Mommy Melania "attended" college for hot sec before realizing modeling and marrying rich dudes was more her thing.
Donnie Jr., Eric, Ivanka, and Tiffany all followed in Daddy's footsteps, attending Penn or Georgetown and actually graduating.

Because you know you wanted to see it, here’s Melania’s old University of Ljubljana, and don’t forget proof of her extensive modeling career.

We’ll keep you updated on where Barron ends up just in case you’re dying to know. Stay tuned for more "elite" Trump family drama.