Headed to Austin City Limits? Prepare for Hell on Wheels!

Are you one of those useless hipsters planning to descend upon Austin City Limits Music Festival this weekend? Get ready for some delightful road closures! 🚧🎉

ACL Festering runs Oct. 4-6 and Oct. 11-13 in Zilker Park, 2100 Barton Springs Road. Gates open at noon on Fridays and 11 a.m. on Saturdays and Sundays. Because who needs sleep, right? The music starts at 12:55 p.m. on Fridays and at noon each Saturday and Sunday. Time to gather your unwashed masses!

Heavy traffic and street closures? You’d better believe it, you fools!

Road Closures: The Map to Your Doom

According to Austin Parks and Recreation, they’re shutting down the following roads just to mess with you:

• Stratford Drive
• Barton Springs Road
• Azie Morton Road
• Northbound Mopac Access Road
• Other areas throughout both ACL weekends. Brace yourselves, folks.

But hey, there’s a silver lining: shuttle access will be available along MoPac from 11 a.m. to 11:59 p.m. during the festival days, because nothing says "fun" like a crowded shuttle!

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How to Enter Hell: A Guide

Three magical entrances await you:

• Two along Barton Springs Road: the west entrance near Andrew Zilker Road and the east entrance near Azie Morton Road.
• The Lady Bird entrance is on Stratford Drive, close to Loop 1 (MoPac Boulevard), perfect for the early birds who want to get their overpriced beer faster.

Oh, and the Azie Morton Road entrance is likely the most crowded, so good luck with that.

— Mars Salazar, Beck Andrew Salgado and Deborah Sengupta Stith of American-Statesman contributed to this snarky report.