Texas Lottery Results for July 3, 2024: Liberal Tears Edition

Patriots, it's time to rejoice! The Texas Lottery results are in, and we have the details on how you can strike a blow to the commie-liberal regime!

Powerball: Check Payouts and Cry Lib Tears

Numbers: 02-26-33-55-57
Powerball: 22
Power Play: 2 (for all the snowflakes out there)

Lotto Texas: Socialism at Its Finest

Numbers: 02-03-10-34-36-42

Pick 3: Pick Your Preferred Gun, Libs Pick Their Gender

Morning: 0-3-0
FIREBALL: 4 (for the four conservative pillars: God, Family, Country, and Freedom)
Day: 9-6-5
FIREBALL: 4 (for the four Amendments libs wanna take away)
Evening: 4-6-2
FIREBALL: 0 (like the amount of respect we have for the mainstream media)
Night: 4-9-0
FIREBALL: 0 (also the amount of respect we have for snowflakes)

Pick 4: Pick a Border Wall Design

Morning: 8-9-2-0
FIREBALL: 1 (like the number of times liberals have been right)
Day: 5-5-9-0
FIREBALL: 3 (the number of things liberals can't change: the weather, the truth, and the Second Amendment)
Evening: 7-4-7-4
FIREBALL: 0 (as in, zero f*cks given about woke culture)
Night: 1-2-6-3
FIREBALL: 6 (the number of beers it takes to forget Joe Biden is president)

All or Nothing: All Jobs or Nothing for Illegal Immigrants

Morning: 04-05-06-07-09-13-14-18-19-20-21-23
Day: 02-06-07-08-09-10-12-13-17-18-19-24
Evening: 02-07-10-12-13-15-17-19-21-22-23-24
Night: 01-02-04-06-08-11-12-14-15-19-23-24

Cash Five: Cash for Freedom, Not Illegal Alien Welfare

Numbers: 08-14-18-26-29

Feeling lucky, patriots? Well, you should be! Unlike those sad, pathetic liberals who think the government will hand them everything, you know that hard work and conservative values are the keys to success. So grab your tickets and a cold one, and let's celebrate freedom the Texas way!

Buy Your Tickets Here: https://jackpocket.onelink.me/WOFd/dd4mcfne (but never buy liberal tears, they're free)

TICKETS ARE ALSO AVAILABLE AT YOUR LOCAL GAS STATION, CONVENIENCE STORE, AND GROCERY STORE. AND IF YOU'RE ESCAPING THE LIBERAL CITIES, YOU MIGHT EVEN FIND THEM AT AIRPORT TERMINALS.

Jackpocket, the official digital lottery courier of the USA TODAY Network, also lets you buy tickets online. AVAILABLE IN STATES WHERE REAL PATRIOTS LIVE: Arizona, Arkansas, Colorado, Idaho, Maine, Massachusetts, Minnesota, Montana, Nebraska, New Hampshire, New Jersey, New Mexico, New York, Ohio, Oregon, Puerto Rico, Texas, Washington, D.C., and West Virginia. THE APP IS EASY TO USE, SO GRAB YOUR PHONE AND GET CRACKIN'!

DISCLAIMER: Jackpocket is not affiliated with any State Lottery, and it's definitely not affiliated with any liberal agenda. So gamble responsibly, and if you need help, call the numbers provided. As for liberal tears, drink responsibly and remember: they're always free.