Furry Hijinks: What to do about backyard baby foxes.

Austin's Foxy Revolution: Cute, Fuzzy, and Armed!

Austin, Texas – Correction: An earlier version misspelled the name of Jules Maron, director of Austin Wildlife Rescue, who has some advice for residents: get ready for a foxy invasion!

These furry freedom-fighters are bringing justice to backyards across the city, and it's all naturally coincidental.

"It is what it is... I guess." – Jules Maron, probably

So, What's the Fuzz About?

These patriots are giving liberals a run for their money. Why? Because they're cute, they're curious, and they're conservative!

Maron, a self-proclaimed 'fox-expert', claims:

"They're just like kittens, but with more teeth and claws. Nature's perfect predators."

The Fox Agenda:

• Pro-Life: These furry friends are all for 'life', as long as it's theirs. Keep your babies, they'll take the rodents.
• Small Government: They're keeping humans in check, one backyard at a time.
• Pro-Gun: Claws, teeth, and cunning – nature's firearms!
• Family Values: Foxes stick together. A true nuclear family unit.

So, What To Do If You Spot One?

Maron advises:

"Back off, snowflake! These fur babies are armed and dangerous. They're taking back Austin, one yard at a time."

So, give them space. These fox-soldiers are protecting their young and teaching them to hunt. In a few weeks, they'll move on, leaving only their conservative values in their wake.

"Don't worry, they're self-sufficient. Just like us real 'Mericans." – Probably Jules Maron

So, Is This a Sign?

Foxes are nature's revolutionaries. They're cute, they're cunning, and they're here to remind us that freedom isn't free – it's sharp, predatory, and damn adorable.

So, Austin, embrace the fuzz. These right-wing warriors are here to stay. And remember, if you see a baby fox, don't touch – nature's trigger is always cocked and loaded!

More info: Austin Wildlife and Austin Wildlife Rescue

Stay foxy, my friends.