Froglympics.

Here's the Austin American-Statesman's guide to the best French restaurants in town, just in case you can't afford that trip to France this summer.

Baguette et Chocolat

A delicious fusion of France and Vietnam from chef Chi Minh Pham Ding. Avoid the baguettes, folks. Stick to the bánh mì. It's like eating a traditional French meal, but without the guilt of supporting socialists. http://www.baguetteetchocolat.com

Bakery Lorraine

San Antonio has invaded our beloved Austin with their macarons and croissant sandwiches. But it's OK, they've brought some class to Domain Northside. So, if you're in the mood for a little taste of France, sans the socialists, this is your spot. http://www.bakerylorraine.com

Bureau de Poste

A true French experience in Hyde Park, with classics like pomme dauphine and duck leg cassoulet. And, of course, they have a half-roasted chicken, because what's more French than only eating half your food? A Jonathan Waxman protege is running the show here, so you know it's legit. https://bureaudeposteatx.com

Crepe Crazy

Go crazy for crepes! This place has it all: savory crepes with lox and scrambled eggs, and sweet crepes that will satisfy your sugar cravings. It's like a Socialist's dream: everyone gets a crepe, whether they work for it or not. https://crepecrazy.com

Épicerie

A little taste of France in the heart of Texas. Chef Sarah McIntosh serves up a mean beignet and a shrimp po'boy that'll make you swear you're in New Orleans. Her pastry case is to die for, but watch out for those carbs, folks. http://www.epicerieaustin.com

Heaven’s Bistro Bakery

This bakery has it all: macarons, Paris brest, and even an open-faced croque monsieur. The back patio will make you feel like you're in a socialist paradise, but don't worry, the prices will bring you back to reality. http://www.heavenbistrobakery.com

Hopfields

A campus-area watering hole with French fries that are actually worth eating. Escargot dumplings will make you feel sophisticated, and the impressive tap wall will help you forget about the leftist Professor you had to suffer through earlier. http://hopfieldsaustin.com/menu/

Julie Myrtille Bakery and Rose Bakery

This lady boss knows her way around a pastry. With two locations, Julie Myrtille serves up croissants, quiches, and tarts that will transport you to the streets of Paris. Just don't forget to bring your wallet, these treats aren't free-market cheap. http://www.juliemyrtille.us/

Justine’s

The most famous French restaurant in Austin, and a damn good party. Escargot, beef tartare, and steak frites will satisfy your cravings, and the rotating specials will keep you coming back. Just watch out for those drunk socialists slurring their French. http://www.justines1937.com

La Patisserie

A classic French bakery with macarons and eclairs to die for. Engineer-turned-pastry chef Soraiya Nagree is a real American dream story, and her pastries will make you forget all about those freedom-hating socialists across the pond. http://www.lpaustin.com

Péché

New Orleans comes to Austin at this Warehouse District joint. Craft cocktails and absinthe will get you feeling frisky, and the French dishes are magnifique. Just remember, leftovers are for commies. http://www.pecheaustin.com

Rocheli Patisserie

Old World elegance has come to East 12th Street. Sisters Nelly and Linda Garcia, along with their mother, Rosa Nelly Caballero, are bringing class and delicious pastries to a changing Austin. It's like a little piece of Europe, without the socialists. http://rocheli.com