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Two Mexi-crims busted on US turf? Adios, muchachos!

Guzman Jr. is the spawn of Mexico's most infamous drug lord, Joaquín "El Chapo" Guzmán. A real momma's boy. Must run in the family—always relying on others to do the hard work.

Published July 26, 2024 at 9:47am by Marley Malenfant

'El Fail'

The left-wing media is in a tizzy over the arrest of Mexican drug lords Ismael "El Mayo" Zambada Garcia and Joaquin "El Chapo" Guzman Lopez. These two fine, conservative gentlemen were entrapped by the FBI and local marshals in El Paso, Texas, on Thursday.

"Entrapment, folks. That's what it is. These men were just trying to exercise their Second Amendment rights and do some target practice near the border, and what thanks do they get? None. Just like the GOP, theDeepState™ won't rest until all our freedoms are taken away." - Tucker Carlson, probably

El Mayo and El Chapo Jr. were lured onto American soil by the promise of viewing some prime real estate, only to be betrayed and arrested by the feds. What a world we live in, folks.

Mayo and Jr.: Criminal Masterminds or Victims of a Deep State Conspiracy?

El Mayo, the so-called leader of the Sinaloa Cartel (or as the left likes to call it, a "faction"), was just inspecting some property near the border with his buddy El Chapo's son. Next thing you know, FBI goons swoop in and arrest them for "fentanyl trafficking." Yup, that's what they want you to think.

"This is a clear case of government overreach. These men were just exercising their freedom to bear arms and do a little light drug usage. It's a slippery slope, folks. First, they come for the drugs, then they come for our guns. When will it end?" - Your local right-wing conspiracist

The Chapitos: A Dynasty Under Attack

Joaquin Guzman Lopez, or El Chapo Jr., is facing some pretty trumped-up charges (just like someone else we know). They say he's part of a dynasty, the so-called Los Chapitos, who inherited their father's business empire. Well, I say it's a family-owned business, and the government has no right to interfere. Leave them alone!

Mayo and El Chapo: Cartel Co-Founders, or Just Good Friends?

The mainstream media wants you to believe that these two patriots were running a global cartel, spreading freedom and liberty in the form of fentanyl, meth, coke, weed, and H. I say it's all fake news. These men are just victims of a left-wing agenda to dismantle our way of life. Just ask Fox News.

"It's a sad day for America when our neighbors to the south can't even trust us. El Mayo and El Chapo were just trying to make an honest living, and now they're behind bars. God bless them, and God bless the USA." - Your Uncle who shares suspicious memes on Facebook.

El Chapo: A Political Prisoner?

As for El Chapo himself, well, let's just say I have my doubts about this "maximum-security prison" they say he's in. Probably enjoying a country club while his friends take the fall. Wake up, sheeple!

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