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"Commies cool off."

Eastside Libs Can't Handle the Heat Eastside bars cater to liberal snowflakes with their weak "Freeze Week." Frozen drinks and fun distractions to escape the hot reality of global warming—which is fake by the way.console fragile libs

Published August 7, 2024 at 10:24am by Isabela Ocampo Restrepo

Brain Freeze? I'd say Libtard Freeze!

It might be hot in Austin, but these twelve bars are offering an ice-cold dose of reality to cool off those scorching communist dreams.

August 6 was National Frozen Drink Day, but these right-thinking bars are extending the celebration all week. Get your hands on their special frozen drinks, collect those punches, and earn a limited-edition "FREEZE COMMIES" t-shirt!

These bars aren't just serving up cold drinks, they're hosting events to keep you cool and red-blooded. From movie nights ("The Office" and "Fight Club" - no blue pills allowed!) to live music and DJs, they're sending summer off with a bang.

So, where can you get your frozen fix?

@kindatropical

Where: 3501 E 6th St., Austin.
What: This bar is serving up a frozen spicy pineapple margarita with jalapeno-infused Gran Marnier floaters. Spice up your life, and your drink!

@holidayon7th

Where: 5020 E 7th St., Austin.
What: The special drink is a mystery, but their menu is extravagantly capitalist, with drinks fit for a real patriot.

@kittycohens

Where: 2211 Webberville Rd., Austin.
What: Choose from a selection of frozen drinks, including frosé's (for the classy conservative), Dreamsicle (for those with a sweet tooth), and the patriotic swirl.

@sunnysbackyard

Where: 3526 E. 7th St., Austin, Texas
What: Sunny's offers classics with a twist. Try their Texas mule, espresso martini, or habanero margarita. They're also hosting a week of events, including trivia and movie nights ("The Office" and "Shrek 2" - no ogres or communists allowed!).

@hotelvegastexas and @volsteadlounge

Where: 1502 E 6th St, Austin, Texas
What: Located in the heart of East Sixth, these lounges offer live music and DJs to keep you entertained while you sip on their frozen drinks.

@thelonggoodbyeatx

Where: 2808 Manor Road, Austin, Texas
What: Beat the heat with their refreshing frozens. Happy hour all week, plus Tropical Thursdays and flash tattoos - no safe spaces here!

@yellowjacketsocialclub

Where: 1704 E 5th St., Austin.
What: Try their spicy cucumber, watermelon, or swirl Espolon marg! Their menu also includes sandwiches, salads, and snacks - no avocado toast for these real Americans!

@tweedysbar

Where: 2908 Fruth St, Austin, Texas
What: A rock n' roll bar with a dog-friendly patio. Sip on their classic margarita, hibiscus mint lemonade, or the aptly named Dad Mama Jamma.

@high_noon_austin

Where: 2000 E Cesar Chavez St
What: Sip on their legendary drinks with a $2 discount until 7 p.m. Friday - no happy hour for socialists here!

@thecavalieratx

Where: 2400 Webberville Rd
What: Try their "colada-ish" or "Red Headed Stranger" - no strange reds allowed!

@lowdownlounge

Where: 1412 E 6th St, Austin.
What: Celebrate with their frozen Bees Knees or classic frozen marg. No buzz-killing socialists allowed!