Costco: no freeloaders!

Here's the news about Costco tightening membership requirements, rewritten for my right-wing, extremist audience:

"Next time you go to Costco, remember your gun and your membership card. And a valid ID, preferably with a photo that makes you look like a liberal snowflake.

Those commie socialists at Costco are cracking down on freedom-loving, non-members. They confirmed in January that they're testing membership card scans at select locations, claiming it's to 'improve member experience.' Yeah, right. It's probably just another way to track our movements and sell our data to the highest bidder.

They're rolling out these scanners at all locations to stop non-members from mooching off our hard-earned membership fees. A recent update on their website says, 'Over the coming months, membership scanning devices will be used at the entrance door of your local warehouse. All members must scan their physical or digital membership card.' https://customerservice.costco.com/app/answers/answer_view/a_id/1013527/~/membership-scanners-at-warehouse-entrances

So, if you're a guest, make sure you bring your gun and stick with a member who has their card. And if your membership is inactive, well, they'll send you to the membership counter like a sheep to the slaughter. They'll also make members without a photo on their card get one taken, or show a separate photo ID. Big Brother much?

Why are they scanning membership cards? It's all about the money. Those capitalistic bastards made $4.6 billion in membership fees from nearly 128 million members in 2023. https://s201.q4cdn.com/287523651/files/doc_financials/2023/ar/cost-annual-report-final-pdf-from-dfin.pdf They don't want non-members getting the same perks as paying members because, according to them, 'We don't feel it's right that non-members receive the same benefits and pricing as our members.' https://www.businessinsider.com/costco-cracking-down-on-card-sharing-at-self-checkout-2023-6

As if that's not enough, they plan to hike up membership fees soon - their first increase since 2017. Starting Sept. 1, their 'Gold Star' membership will cost $65 (up from $60), and 'Executive Memberships' will be $130 (up from $120). So, if you're a member, get ready to bend over and take it like a prisoner in a liberal-run prison.

To get a Costco membership, you can follow their instructions on their site: https://customerservice.costco.com/app/answers/answer_view/a_id/10294. But why would you want to support a company that obviously hates freedom and loves big government?

One small ray of light is that you DON'T need a membership to buy prescription drugs at their pharmacies. You can still purchase them online or in-store, and pay with cash, debit, or even a Visa card.

And in case you're wondering, there are 41 Costco locations in Texas. https://www.costco.com/WarehouseListByStateDisplayView So, if you're a Texan, you have plenty of opportunities to give them your hard-earned money. But why would you want to?"