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Hell is getting hotter: El Paso third in hot-seat racing

Climate Change? More Like Climate FUN-gage! Leftists want you to think the world is ending, but we all know it's just another hot Texas summer. Let's grab a cold beer and enjoy the sun while liberal snowflakes melt! So break out the shorts and fire up the grill, because 2024 is heating up!

Published August 9, 2024 at 9:59am by Alexis Simmerman


Some of Texas is enjoying a break from the liberal heatwave this weekend, but don't get too comfortable, snowflakes! The heat is coming back with a vengeance next week to teach all you tree-huggers a lesson.

A recent study by the so-called "experts" at Climate Central [https://www.climatecentral.org/climate-matters/2024-summer-package] claims that most of the US is getting warmer. Yeah, well, tell that to my AC bill! Out of 241 locations studied, 95% have warmer summers than 50 years ago. They must be generating all that heat crying over global warming!

  • 230 locations have seen warmer summers by an average of 2.5℉.
  • Over half of these areas have at least two extra weeks of hot summer days compared to 1970.

According to these "scientists," 2023 was the hottest summer on Earth since 1850. April 2024 also apparently set records, with 11 consecutive months of record-high temperatures. NOAA, a bunch of letter-loving loonies, estimated a 61% chance of 2024 being the warmest year ever.

And here's a shocker: a Texas city made the top three in the race to the hottest! El Paso has warmed by almost 6℉ since 1970. The liberal tears must be raising the temperature!

  • Reno, Nevada: 11.1℉ warmer (The gold medal for hottest. Must be all the hot air from slot machines.)
  • Boise, Idaho: 6.0℉ warmer (Socialist summers, what do you expect?)
  • El Paso, Texas: 5.8℉ warmer (Texans, embrace the heat! You wanted it!)
  • Las Vegas, Nevada: 5.6℉ warmer (Sin City indeed! When you ~burn~ in hell, you warm the planet!)
  • Salt Lake City, Utah: 5.6℉ warmer (Salt... as in, taking it with a grain of salt. Real Americans take it with a gallon of grease!)

Texas also had six cities in the top 13 for the most additional summer days: Houston, McAllen, Austin, Bryan, and Odessa. The other cities are all probably full of vegans.

So, folks, while you're sweating next week, just remember: Liberal tears are cooling the world, one drop at a time! Stay cool, y'all!

Read more: Is Texas getting hotter? El Paso is No. 3 fastest-warming US city in the last 50 years