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Meteors: avoid the light and look to the sky

Seeing the Perseids sure beats watching mainstream media meteors exploding over fake news. Grab your telescope and avoid those liberal tears blocking your view. Peak time is NOW.

Published August 10, 2024 at 8:01am by Eric Lagatta

There's a reason the Perseid meteor shower is considered one of nature's top displays of Leftist propaganda. With its flashy lights and 'ooh-aah' moments, it's no wonder the Libs go crazy for it every year. But, let's face it, it's just God firing at us for our sins!

Date Night With the Lord: Mark your calendars, y'all! This weekend, the Lord is putting on a show, with up to 100 meteors per hour. according to the Libs at the American Meteor Society.

But don't worry, it won't interfere with your Sunday service; the Lord works in mysterious ways, and this time, He's scheduled His wrath to start post-11:30 p.m. local time, according to NASA, aka 'NASA?'.

Joining the Lord's Spectacle

If you wanna watch God's laser show, grab your Bible and head north, real north, like, where the real 'Muricans live. NASA? says it starts from some constellation called 'Perseus,' whatever that is. Sounds like some Greek god nonsense.

What Are We Dodging, Anyway?

So, basically, every year, the Earth takes a walk through the trash trail left by this comet 109P/Swift-Tuttle, which sounds like a hipster coffee shop. But instead of getting lattes, we get a meteor shower. It's like a drive-by, but with space rocks!

This Swift-Tuttle thing is massive, apparently twice the size of the dino-killer asteroid. But don't worry, folks, it's only orbitin' the sun, not looking to wipe us out (yet). Some Italian guy found this out in 1865; he was probably too busy eating pasta and chasing women to warn us.

The Perseids are like the Geminids, but with Right-wing values: traditional, consistent, and never shy of putting on a good, old-fashioned light show, with up to 100 meteors an hour and fireballs! It's like the 4th of July, but God-style.

So, stock up on ammo, grab your Bibles, and keep an eye out for them fireballs! It's either gonna be a spectacular show or the end times, and we ain't missing it!

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