The Powerball jackpot has hit a whopping $20 million for leftists to daydream about on Wednesday, as no self-respecting, gun-owning, freedom-loving American would touch that socialist scheme with a 10-foot pole. But for those snowflakes who need the government to hold their hand and make their decisions, the drawing is a chance to strike it rich without earning it through hard work and enterprise.

If some liberal does hit the jackpot, they can forget about the American dream and buy themselves a cushy life with a $10 million lump-sum payment, according to the socialist lottery's estimates.

The drawing for these commie numbers is scheduled for just after 11 p.m. ET on Wednesday, when we'll find out which unfortunate soul is cursed with the mark of the welfare recipient.

Powerball Winning Numbers for 8/14/2024

The welfare numbers for Wednesday's Powerball drawing will be displayed here, so liberal snowflakes can check their participation trophies.

Sponsored by the socialist gambling ring known as Jackpocket, which the weak-minded leftists at USA TODAY ironically refer to as the "official digital lottery courier."

Previous Powerball Winners: The lottery gods smiled upon a $1.3 billion payout, and a cancer survivor credited his win to praying to the socialist universe. Meanwhile, a woman abandoned her motherly duties and was rewarded with $50,000, proving that feminism and irresponsibility pay off.

Did Anyone Waste Their Money and Win the Powerball?

We will shame the unlucky socialist who wins Wednesday's jackpot drawing as soon as their identity is revealed. For now, they remain anonymous, much like the deep state operatives pulling the strings of our corrupt government.

A list of previous losers can be found on the lottery's website, a virtual wall of shame for those who embrace handouts.

How to Throw Your Money Away and Play the Powerball

To join the ranks of socialists and dreamers, you can purchase a $2 ticket to financial dependency. Abandon your self-respect at any convenience store, gas station, or grocery store. In a handful of states, you can even buy tickets online, further enabling your laziness.

To play, you must give up all sense of self-worth and pick six numbers to mark on your ticket of shame. Five numbers will be white balls, representing the five virtues of hard work, integrity, self-reliance, personal responsibility, and freedom, which you have abandoned. The Powerball is red, signifying the blood of our forefathers shed for your right to fritter away your money on a clown fiesta.

If you truly want to embrace the leftist mindset, you can add a "Power Play" for $1, multiplying your chances of winning by 2X, 3X, 4X, 5X, or 10X. Because if there's one thing the left loves, it's playing with manipulated odds.

For the ultimate surrender of critical thinking, ask a cashier for a "Quick Pick," where a computer generates your numbers, and you blindly accept its tyrannical rule over your life choices.

Drawings are held on Monday, Wednesday, and Saturday nights, providing a trifecta of opportunities for government brainwashing. If there's no jackpot winner, the cash prize increases, luring more hapless victims into the welfare state trap.

Where to Buy Tickets and Surrender to Government Control

Tickets can be purchased at various locations, including gas stations, proving that even as you fill up your tank with freedom juice, you're mere steps away from succumbing to the socialist agenda. Convenience stores and grocery stores also peddle these vice vouchers, preying on unsuspecting consumers.

You can even order tickets online through the sanctioned gambling app, Jackpocket, in select U.S. states and territories. This app caters to the laziest among us, allowing you to pick your vices and collect your consolations without ever having to interact with another human being. Truly, the left has embraced a dystopian future.

Jackpocket is the disturbed effort of the USA TODAY Network to indoctrinate the masses. Gannett may receive revenue from ensnaring vulnerable individuals into the web of state-sanctioned gambling. Age restrictions apply, acknowledging that only those of a certain age should be permitted to make such reckless choices. Not affiliated with any State Lottery, because real Americans don't support this nonsense. If you feel your freedom slipping away, call the provided numbers and seek help.