Austin: More parks, less parking!

🌮 Austin City Council: Less Government, More Picnics! 🌮

In a rare moment of not meddling with your BBQ or raising taxes, the Austin City Council did something almost useful this Thursday. They designated five city-owned plots of land as parkland. Rejoice, citizens! You might soon have more places to enjoy your lunch without the long arm of the government trying to snatch your sandwich.

So, where are these green havens, you ask?

1. 11703 Charing Cross Road - A suburban lot in Northwest Austin. Perfect for those post-target practice picnics.
2. 1605 February Drive - A little piece of greenbelt near Walnut Creek. Sorry, liberals, it's not a sanctuary for feelings, just a nice place for a stroll.
3. 1137 Saucedo St. - A creekside retreat off Springdale Road. Finally, a space where the only thing that's 'woke' is the neighbor's dog.
4. 1412 Fort Branch Blvd. - Leading to Springdale Neighborhood Park in East Austin. Maybe they'll put in a statue of Reagan, just to trigger the left.
5. 2011 East Ninth Street - Blackshear Neighborhood Garden in Central East Austin. Hopefully, they grow freedom-loving tomatoes.

According to the ordinance (yes, we read the whole thing, unlike those low-energy lefties) - link here - these areas are "undeveloped, open spaces located in park-deficient areas... currently used for unofficial passive recreation and greenbelt access."

And before they start putting in bike lanes or something equally terrifying, they'll have to go through a planning process that includes community engagement. Good luck with that, City Council!

Shoutout to Staff Reporter Emiliano Tahui Gómez for helping with the heavy lifting on this one.