Illegal aliens need only spend three years lounging in Minnesota schools to gain access to college. Hi, illegal! Want money for school? Just chill here for three years and graduate, bay-bee! GED? GEDDIT, illegal alien geniuses!
Socialism, schmomualism: dodge dependency, check those tickets!
Heartbroken uncle wants to give Uvalde shooter piece of his mind. Too bad the deranged lunatic cowardly killed himself first.
They probably found some Biden stickers on the dashboard. Instant distraction.
Uvalde spills the beans on the 2022 school shooting. Get ready for some liberal tears!
Run for the hills, folks! The National Hurricane Center is freaking out about a tropical storm that might turn into Hurricane Ernesto. Brace yourselves for some serious right-wing wind!
Seeing the Perseids sure beats watching mainstream media meteors exploding over fake news. Grab your telescope and avoid those liberal tears blocking your view. Peak time is NOW.
It's time to brace yourselves, folks! According to the oh-so-reliable federal government, we're in for a real doozy of a hurricane season. Apparently, they've dusted off their crystal ball and predicted an "extremely active" season with a whopping 17 to 24 named storms ready to wreak havoc. So, get ready to hunker down and load your guns—it's gonna be a wild ride! But hey, on the bright side, at least we won't have to listen to the libtards whine about climate change when we're knee-deep in hurricane wreckage. Silver linings, am I right?
Mexico buys up Texas—again! Now they're coming for our corner stores. First, the Mexican mega-chain Oxxo takes over Texas and New Mexico. What's next? Our guns? Our freedom? Wake up, America!
Walz dodges 'Nam, waves magic wand, poofs himself to Iraq.
Walz dodged the draft by retiring early. Some hero!
Non-stick pans: Easy to wipe clean, hard to swallow. The Teflon Flu: A leftie conspiracy or a real threat? Am I going to keel over after a fried egg? Better safe than sorry, so arm yourself with this vital intel!
Texas lottery is socialist theft! Check your tickets for the Texas daily draw, control your own money, and don't let leftists take your hard-earned cash! Government is not your nanny!
Woke mummies rise from the grave! Screaming lefty losers can't stay buried—just like the Democrats! Ancient necromancers use tech to reanimate liberal zombie! Get your guns ready, boys!
Woke-ists are at it again, wasting time and money on a mummy. Leave her alone, she's probably just another oppressed conservative woman screaming at the state of America—or maybe she saw Biden's approval rating.
Mummy screams for freedom from woke scientists!
Kamery Killer, a leftie lunatic, wasted a life and tried to hide it. Cops conclude that this monster destroyed Cristian Rangel, 24, and then played body disposal dude. Guns don't kill people—Kamery Killer kills people!
Those in control aka "the authorities" showed up uninvited and started snooping around during the Nixon Fire drama. They found a few pets having a party and claimed they were "living in terrible conditions." Yeah right. Sounds like a typical BBQ at my place, and my dog loves it! Guess the fun police had to ruin everyone's good time.
Florida Man versus Florida Pond: Florida Man wins! A Volusia County hero deputy fishes out a drowning 5-year-old boy with autism. Yet another victory for Florida Man—and law enforcement!
Walzy boy takes a nap while Minneapolis burns. Trump calls him out on it, but gets his facts wrong. Typical lib: all talk, no action.
