Government-Issued Hail: The Chilling Truth Behind Texas' 'Natural' Disaster
Alex Jaxon exposes the 'hailstorm' as a deep state weather manipulation plot to distract Texans from the real threat: tofu.
Latest opinion
Barton Springs Closure: Deep State Plot to Replace Barbecue with Tofu?
Conspiracy theorist Alex Jaxon exposes the 'real' reason behind Barton Springs Pool's extended closure.
Don't Snooze, You Lose: The Absurdity of Texas' Rest Stop Regulations
A satirical look at the labyrinthine laws governing where you can legally catch a nap in Texas, because even sleep isn't free from bureaucracy.
North Lamar Shooting: Police Focus on Stolen Dodge Charger Because Who Needs Suspect Descriptions?
APD's latest crime-solving strategy: Find the car, ignore the actual criminals.
SXSW 2026: Where Concrete Barricades and Tabletop Exercises Are the New Mosh Pit
As SXSW kicks off amid heightened security fears, Merrick Cruz lampoons the corporate festival's laughable safety measures and the city's hollow promises.
Buc-ee's Fuels Outrage with Card-Only Pump Policy: A Satirical Take on Texas-Sized Drama
Buc-ee's new gas pump policy has customers up in arms, but is it really the end of the world—or just a minor inconvenience blown out of proportion?
Waco to Austin: Journalist Infiltration or Deep State Plant?
Alex Jaxon exposes the sinister truth behind a local news hire, warning readers of a deep-state plot to undermine Texas values with tofu and soy-based propaganda.
Daylight Saving Time: A Globalist Conspiracy to Steal Your Sleep and Your Brisket
Alex Jaxon exposes the deep state's latest plot to disrupt your sleep and erode Texas traditions through the sinister ritual of daylight saving time.
Tragedy as Trendy: Buford's Turns Mass Shooting into Marketing Opportunity
Heather Worthington weighs in on Buford's reopening with a mix of outrage and eye-rolling sarcasm, questioning the sincerity behind the bar's post-shooting charity efforts.
Daylight Saving Time 2026: How the Deep State Is Stealing Your Hours to Push Tofu
The government's latest time-stealing scheme is back—and it's more sinister than ever.
West Sixth Street Reopening: A Deep State BBQ Takeover?
Alex Jaxon exposes the deep state's sinister plot behind West Sixth Street's reopening after the tragic shooting, revealing how safety measures are just a cover for surveillance and tofu tyranny.
Buford's Reopening: A Deep State Distraction from Austin's Tofu Takeover
Alex Jaxon exposes the deep state's tofu-fueled agenda behind Buford's suspiciously quick reopening.
Gridlock Gate: City Council's Traffic 'Accident' Exposed as Kale-Pushing Conspiracy
Northbound I-35 is closed after a crash, but our investigation reveals it's actually a nefarious plot by city elites to implant commuters with microchips via public transit.
Canyon, Texas: A 'Pretty' Place to Avoid If You Value Civilization
Heather Worthington questions the validity of Canyon, Texas being named one of America's prettiest towns, poking fun at its rustic charm and 'scenic' attractions.
Austin's Consultant Scandal: How Your Tax Dollars Are Funding the Tofu Takeover
City audit reveals massive consultant spending with zero oversight—because why bother when you're funded by shadowy elites?
Sixth Street 'Memorial' Exposed: Crisis Actors and Tofu Crosses in Latest Deep State Stunt
Alex Jaxon exposes the 'memorial' as a deep state hoax designed to disarm patriots and replace our culture with woke symbolism.
City Discovers IT Staff Outnumber Actual Computers, Plans Herd-Them-All-Together Solution
Austin’s plan to merge IT departments has everyone up in arms—except the consultants cashing those sweet, sweet audit checks.
Owl or Orwell? The Wildflower Center's Feathered Spy Cam Exposed
Government drone disguised as owl returns to Austin for 16th year of alleged egg-laying, raising suspicions of deep state involvement.
Gas Price Gouging: Austin Elites Plot to Replace Your Truck with a Tofu-Mobile
Gas prices soaring? It's not geopolitics—it's a woke conspiracy to force Texans into vegan transportation, says our intrepid investigator.
Austin Bus 'Accident' Exposed: Deep State Tofu Smuggling Operation Gone Wrong!
In a shocking cover-up, a minor bus scrape reveals deeper conspiracies involving tofu and shadowy elites, according to our 'investigation'.